Latin Friend

(Following is the text of a little chapel talk I was asked to give to an upper school community back in 2017).

You’ve seen the Latin phrase Esse quam videri around campus, I’m sure.  Most notably perhaps on the small stone pillar donated to the school by the class of 1910. A pillar that moves around campus from year to year as though it gets restless and needs an occasional change of scenery. Or as if someone around here is playing a long practical joke.  

The Latin phrase means “to be, rather than to seem.”

We might also say: “to value the authentic over the superficial.” It’s a great motto generally, and I especially think it’s an excellent guiding principle for a school.

I’ve even taken an interest in the many adventures of the pillar itself. When I first arrived here ten years ago, it was over by the north side of the humanities house, sort of where the headmaster’s parking space is today. Only it wasn’t a parking space back then, it was a peaceful grassy area surrounded by trees and hedges; a lovely place to contemplate Latin mottos.

But then there were those dark years during which the pillar occupied an awkward and undignified place next to the lacrosse fields and directly in front of the portable toilet that appears there every spring like a noxious perennial.  I suspect that placement was to disguise the port-a-potty more than to denigrate the pillar, but the result was always incongruous and sad.

Happily, our Latinate friend seems to have found a home over by the southwest corner of the humanities house, where the walkways between all of our campus buildings converge. This central location is much more appropriate because that pillar bears a message that we really ought to encounter on a regular basis.

Amidst the hustle and bustle and stress of the school week, our peripatetic pillar urges us not to waste time on superficial or unworthy things. As you rush past it on your way to art or science class, it reminds you not to obsess over your image.  Instead, try to be worthy of and true to your own values.

Esse quam videri warns us not to chase external rewards, because they nourish the ego, and the ego is never really satisfied. If you care too much about external validation, you’ll end up driven by a desire for the awards you want and plagued with disappointment over the ones you didn’t get.

I think “being rather than seeming” means finding work that nourishes your soul, not your ego. It means that you’re so committed to your work, whatever it is, that you want to do it even if you never receive any recognition for it. That’s where you’ll find true satisfaction.

Because of my classroom assignments this year, I don’t happen to walk past the pillar much in my day-to-day movement around campus.  But I like knowing it’s there, because this is the place where I do work that nourishes my soul, and it’s good to know there’s a solid stone marker nearby reminding me to keep it real.